Some friendships last for a long time and others don’t. It’s unfortunate, but that’s just the way it is. They say that if a friendship lasts more than seven years that they will be a friend for life. Some of you will remember the movie with Britney Spears called Crossroads. Well back many many moons ago, my best friends and I decided to do exactly what Britney and her friends done. A time capsule. A memory box to be opened in years to come. There was 6 of us at the time doing it and thinking back it was so cute. We wrote down all our dreams and wishes. What we hoped we would achieve and where we wanted to go in life. It was a special time, when really you didn’t have a care in the world & nothing to worry about. Life was bliss but of course it doesn’t stay that way forever. We had planned to open the box when we were all 18/19. Those friendships would last until then right? Well so we thought….
Loosing a friend is one of the hardest things you’ll ever experience. I will never ever forget the times we spent together all 6 of us. The things we done and the laughs we had were unforgettable. Never in a million years did we think that within a few years the cracks in our friendship would appear. We were only 13/14 at the time but slowly the group dwindled. One moved to Australia with her parents which upset us all so much, one I actually had a fight with and another just drifted from the group so the six became three. The three of us walked to school together, partied together, went to festivals together, went on road trips together and the list goes on…I made another amazing friend in secondary school who I had many years of truly great times with.
I think loosing her was by far the hardest friendship I’ve ever had to let go of. I will never forget it. It was like breaking up with a guy. Nobody speaks out as much about loosing friends but every one talks about breaking up with a guy. For me, loosing that friend at 19 was like loosing a family member. I was part of hers and she was part of mine. I never thought in a million years we would not be friends. After our row which totally escalated that was it. A few years later we met up and talked but it was nothing like before. It would never go back to the way it once was. I remember being so nervous first meeting up with her after all them years but we needed to do it. We still talk now and again. When we do, I always think about how much I wish it could be back to what it was all them years ago. She genuinely is one of the nicest, most caring people I’ve ever met. The memories we made will last forever. I made another great friend just soon after. I am still friends with her today and would consider her one of my nearest and dearest. She went off to America for a year then I went off to Australia and even with that distance, we still remain extremely close.
I often think about what if…..what if everything didn’t happen? Where would we be now? Unfortunately in 2015, I lost another long term friend but afterwards I realised that we had grown apart anyway. We weren’t the same anymore, we were so different. I could see the separation happening for a long time. So when it happened I didn’t feel a loss, it was more of a sigh of relief than anything. I wish her the absolute best in everything that happens in her life but things changed. When your younger you have a massive circle. You try to be friends with everyone. You party with everyone and everyone’s your friend. Well kind of…I recall a house party I had back when I was 16 & there was over 200 people there. It was CRAZY! I now have a small close knit group of friends that mean everything to me. I have my true closest friends that I know I’ll be friends with for the rest of my life. They know who they are and they know friendship is a two way thing. I absolutely love my friends like they were my family. I do wish I saw a few of my close friends more often but every-time we meet up it’s like we’ve never parted. We can talk for hours on end. Having true friends is so important. Girls will stick together through thick and thin, they comfort you when you need it, they listen to your problems but most of all they never ever leave your side. When you pass that stage in your friendship it’s different. I would do anything for them and know I’ll be friends with them forever.
What I’m saying is it’s ok to loose friends along the way. You may not like the change. Nobody does. The memories you may have with that friend or them friends will last forever. The times you shared and things you done nobody can take away. No person likes loosing a friend but sometimes it just happens. You constantly meet new people in your career, social circles, through new friends and it’s a massive part of growing up.
I read an article in U Magazine by the fabulous Vicki Notaro on Friendship so decided to write my own. She ended her piece with
“Sure look it – if it can happen to Beyonce and Destiny’s Child, it can happen to any of us.”
And never a more true saying. The friendship may end but memories will last forever.
Love Aoibhe xxx